Someone has told you your writing is passive, or a checker has underlined half your manuscript in purple. This guide explains what passive voice actually is, how to recognize it without a grammar degree, when it is the right choice, and five ways to rewrite it when it is not. There is a full set of before-and-after examples, and a final section that shows how to find passive constructions across a whole manuscript with Quillen's Analyze Document tool.
The short answer
A sentence is passive when its subject receives the action instead of doing it: The door was opened rather than Mara opened the door. You can spot it with a form of "to be" (is, was, were, been) followed by a past participle (opened, closed, given). Passive is not a mistake, but too much of it makes prose slower and vaguer, because it hides who is acting. The fix is usually to move the actor to the front of the sentence, or to find a stronger verb.
What passive voice is
In an active sentence the actor leads: someone does something to something. In a passive sentence the order flips, and the actor can disappear altogether.
A quick test: if you can add by someone after the verb and the sentence still makes sense, it is passive. The map was folded (by someone) is passive. The map was old (by someone) is not, because old is not an action.
Why too much passive voice hurts
- It hides the actor. Mistakes were made says nothing about who made them. In fiction, hiding who acts drains a scene of agency.
- It is longer. The road was being closed by guards takes seven words; Guards were closing the road takes five.
- It slows the pace. Action scenes especially need subjects that do things.
- It keeps the reader at a distance, because nothing in the sentence is making anything happen.
When passive voice is the right choice
Do not hunt it to extinction. It is the right tool when:
- The actor is unknown or unimportant: The salt was carried across the flats.
- The receiver matters more than the actor: The envoy was poisoned.
- You want to hide the actor deliberately, as in a mystery or a character who dodges blame: A decision was made.
- You are writing formal or scientific text where the method matters more than the person.
How to find it
Read for sentences that combine "to be" with a past participle, then ask who is acting. Watch for these common patterns:
- was/were + a word ending in -ed: was folded, were crossed
- was/were + an irregular participle: was given, was taken, was built
- been + participle: had been forgotten
- being + participle: was being watched
Beware of false alarms. Some words that look like participles are really adjectives describing a state: She was tired, the door was closed (describing how it looked, not an action). Tools that find passive voice by pattern, including Quillen's, cannot always tell the difference, so the final call is yours.
Five ways to fix it
- Flip it. Move the actor to the front. The door was opened by Mara becomes Mara opened the door.
- Find the hidden actor. If the sentence has no actor, decide who it is. Nothing had been explained becomes No one had explained anything.
- Pick a stronger verb. Often the whole "was + participle" can be replaced by one verb. The room was filled with smoke becomes Smoke filled the room.
- Restructure the sentence. Sometimes the best fix is a different shape altogether. It was decided that the road would be closed becomes The council closed the road.
- Keep it, on purpose. If the passive version is better for the reason above, leave it, and move on.
Worked examples
These sentences come from a draft of The Salt Road. The rewrites are not the only options, only examples of each approach.
| Passive original | Rewrite | What changed |
|---|---|---|
| Mara Venn was given the map at dawn. | The harbormaster gave Mara Venn the map at dawn. | Added the actor and flipped |
| The road was being closed by guards. | Guards were closing the road. | Flipped; shorter |
| Nothing had been explained to her. | No one had explained anything to her. | Found the hidden actor |
| She realized she was being watched. | Someone was watching her. | Flipped, and cut the filter verb "realized" |
| The flats were crossed by only a few people. | Few people crossed the flats. | Flipped; five words fewer |
| The way had been forgotten by most. | Most had forgotten the way. | Flipped |
| The ledger was signed by the Tollmaster. | The Tollmaster signed the ledger. | Flipped |
| It was decided that the road would be closed. | The council closed the road. | Restructured and named the decision-maker |
| The salt was carried across the flats. | The salt was carried across the flats. | Kept: the carrier does not matter |
| A decision was made. | A decision was made. | Kept on purpose, if the character is dodging blame |
Common mistakes
| Mistake | Why it is a problem | Better |
|---|---|---|
| Removing every passive sentence | Prose becomes monotonous and loses useful emphasis | Fix the ones that hide an actor or slow a scene |
| Treating "was" as the problem | "Was" is also used in plain descriptions: "The room was cold" | Look for "was" plus an action participle |
| Replacing a passive with an even vaguer sentence | "There was a closing of the road" is worse | Name the actor |
| Trusting a tool without reading | It will flag adjectives and miss irregular participles | Treat flags as prompts for judgment |
| Fixing passive voice before structure | You may rewrite scenes you will cut | Do structure and scene work first, then line edits |
Do it in Quillen
Quillen's Analyze Document tool highlights passive constructions in your text and tells you what share of your words they make up, so you can see where to focus. It runs entirely on your computer and works on both fiction and nonfiction books.
- Open a scene (or chapter) in the editor.
- Click Analyze Document in the toolbar. A stats bar appears above the page, one chip per category with a count and a percentage against a target. Passive is the purple one, with a target of under 3% of words.
- Read the underlines. Passive constructions are underlined in purple in your text. In our sample paragraph, was given, been pressed, was being closed, been explained, was being watched, were crossed and been forgotten were all flagged, which put the scene at 16.7%.
- Work through them one by one, using the five fixes above. Decide each time whether the passive is hiding an actor or is the better choice.
- Check the stats again after your edits. Figures above the target show in pink.
- Click Clear Highlights when you are done to get back to a clean page.
How Quillen decides what is passive
It looks for a form of to be (is, am, are, was, were, be, being, been) followed by a word that ends in -ed or -en. That catches most passives, including was given and been forgotten. It also means two things you should know:
- It can flag adjectives. She was tired matches the pattern but is not passive. Ignore those.
- It misses irregular participles that do not end in -ed or -en, such as was built or was done. Read for those yourself.
Because the tool also highlights other categories (filter words, vague words and more), you can fix them in the same pass. In our sample, realized was flagged both as a filter word and inside a passive sentence. We also have a guide to filter words if you want to go deeper there.
Checklist
- Run Analyze Document and note the Passive percentage.
- For each purple underline, ask who is acting.
- Flip, find the actor, choose a stronger verb, or restructure.
- Keep passives that are deliberate or that hide an unimportant actor.
- Ignore false alarms (adjectives like "tired").
- Read for irregular participles the tool cannot see.
- Check the stats once more and clear the highlights.
Common questions
Is passive voice always bad?
No. It is the right choice when the actor is unknown or unimportant, when the receiver matters more, or when you want to hide the actor on purpose. It becomes a problem when it is overused and hides who is acting.
How can I tell if a sentence is passive?
Look for a form of 'to be' (is, was, were, been) followed by a past participle, and see if you can add 'by someone' after the verb. 'The door was opened' is passive; 'The door was old' is not.
How much passive voice is too much?
There is no fixed rule. Quillen's Analyze Document uses a target of under 3% of words for passive constructions as a rough guide, but the real test is whether each one hides an actor or slows a scene.
Can Quillen find passive voice in nonfiction too?
Yes. The Passive category applies to both fiction and nonfiction books. Nonfiction books also get Hedging and Wordiness categories.
Does Quillen's passive voice check miss anything?
It can flag adjectives that look like participles (such as 'was tired') and it misses irregular participles that do not end in -ed or -en, such as 'was built'. Treat the highlights as prompts and read for the rest yourself.